Who is God?

I’ve spent too much time contemplating religion and the existence of God. No matter where I look or how hard I try to let it be as is, the questions always come back. I suspect this is partly due to how ubiquitous religion is in almost every culture. When I'm traveling, there's always a temple, cathedral, or shrine to visit. Religion is usually somehow intertwined into the answers to my questions about why people do certain things like light incense, rest on Sundays, or avoid eating meat. Even in the confines of my agnostic home, religion will find it's way to me via headlines about radical Islam, sexual abuse within the Catholic church, or the debate over teaching religion in school.

The other part of my inability to leave questions about religion alone is my innate curiosity; I can't rest until I have a satisfying answer. Until I wrote the note I'll share with you, I hadn't found one.

The obvious questions that kept coming back to me were:

• If God exists, is there only one?

• And if there is only one, which of the many religions has somehow stumbled upon the correct answer?

• How can something that preaches peace and good behavior be used as an excuse for so much hate and violence?

• If there is no God, how can so many people have gotten it so wrong for so long?

My upbringing was nominally Christian. As children, my two older brothers served as altar boys, a duty I was thankfully spared of when our mom went crazy and our life trajectory took a sharp turn (more on this in the next few notes). The important piece for today's note about God is that my father remarried a Jewish woman and we moved to a new city. Church was cut from our routine and I was at least happy for that.

My dad would make an appearance at the Christmas Eve service each year, I suppose in some attempt to spare himself from the torture of life in hell... but even that ceased after a few years and we didn't touch the topic much as a family since.

I can’t pinpoint a singular reason for my disinterest, but looking back, churches always struck me as weird and uninviting. The unnecessarily high ceilings, the rows of rigid wooden benches with fold down stools to kneel on, the elaborate stained-glass windows, and the image of a suffering figure nailed to a cross... I never felt comfortable.

Perhaps my aversion was as simple as the discomfort and sheer boredom of a child forced to sit through lengthy sermons in such a strange atmosphere.

But part of it was definitely the believability of the stories. Even at my young age, I just couldn't make sense of it. Did the man in the white robe talking down to us really expect me to believe that someone built a boat large enough to house two of every animal species on Earth and that this vessel survived a global flood? The logic, or rather the lack thereof, was baffling.

I knew what it was like to imagine things. I played imaginary games every day. I pretended I Steve Young throwing touchdown passes to Jerry Rice. I build a fort in my backyard and defended it from enemy alien invaders. I even had an imaginary best friend at one point... but even at a young age I knew the difference between fantasy and real life. Why couldn't the pastor differentiate?

Another aspect was that it was mandatory - not that I would have gone if I had the choice. I’ve always had a resistance to being told what to do - something I still harbor and still don't understand. I begrudgingly completed chores even though I knew it was the least I could do for the family that provided me with everything. And early jobs under direct supervision were a struggle. Micro-managers were unbearable.

As a child it felt like a crime to give up a day of play to sit quietly on a wooden bench watching the same people as last week do the same routine in their odd costumes.

What gives me pause, however, is the sheer number of people who are religious. They genuinely believe these stories. They attend services week after week. They celebrate holidays like Easter and Christmas for their real meaning... not just as an excuse to take off work and drink egg nog.

This is the real question that has occupied my thoughts: How could so many people believe something that, to me, seems so untrue?

I’ve found a measure of peace, if not a definitive answer, in exploring history. The rise of organized religion coincides with a pivotal transformation in human society: the shift from small, nomadic hunter-gatherer bands to larger, settled agricultural communities. The advent of agriculture allowed for population growth and the development of more complex social and political structures. Organized religion followed, and perhaps even facilitated, these monumental societal changes. Shared beliefs and rituals likely provided the crucial framework for social cohesion and control in mass societies.

Also, at a fundamental level, humans are creatures of curiosity; we crave explanations. Before the advent of scientific inquiry and the rigorous methodologies of research, gods and supernatural forces were the most readily available means of making sense of the unknown. The need for meaning and purpose seems to be a fundamental human trait.

I am no different.

Though I couldn't find my answers in a church pew, the impulse to find meaning and define my values has lingered. When I traveled, I often found myself having the same post-university conversations with peers from around the world in various hostel guest rooms.

Some people couldn't accept my agnostic stance and belief that life was simply a fluke.

"How can you live with that belief?" they'd ask. "What makes you get up in the morning?"

I would try to explain my worldview, "Well, I usually get up early to go surfing..."

"Do I need to believe in a higher power to treat people with respect and live an honest life? It seems like if everyone did that we'd have a good society. Why do I need the carrot of some vague concept of heaven dangled in front of me?"

With each conversation I grew more confident in my belief that science held the best explanations of how the world worked and that there was no higher power to quiver under. I lived *mostly *content with this for a long time.

But when COVID hit and conspiracy theories ran rampant, I had a new reckoning. Had I put my faith blindly in science the way others put their faith in God? Had I believed too much in experts who based their advice on science? Was the scientific process untrustworthy? Had I been listening to too much Joe Rogan???

I was struck with the fear that, like in many other areas of my life, I had been a giant hypocrite and was just now figuring it out. I didn't have to dig too deep to find answers though.

The key for me was remembering the foundation of science: it is a reproducible method. Anyone can follow the same process under the same circumstances and get the same answer. Its also falsifiable - theories can be disproven.

In contrast, conspiracy theories and religion are purely based on faith. They can not be reproduced. They aren't falsifiable. No one has demonstrated they can build a ship big enough to house all the world's animals. No one has been able to split the water of a river with the wave of their hand.

While the social insanity of COVID proved to be a good test of my trust that science was in-fact the most sane approach to understanding life, I felt a little embarrassed that I had even let it shake me.

I felt the need for a concise guide, a reminder of my own ethos in a world that was becoming increasingly chaotic and uncertain. I needed a clear stance on what I believed, something to ground me in my own truth. So one day, after a good long surf session, when I was thinking clearly, I wrote a guide for myself.

So here's my note, "Nature is God" along with some additional commentary.

"Nature is God"

The rules of life are written in nature.

Physics explains the rules of the universe.

Chemistry explains the rules of molecules.

Biology explains the rules of life.

Evolution is the driving force behind all life Replication of DNA is the source of all motivation.

Sociology explains how humans interact.

Science is human's best method for learning how the world works. It isn't perfect, but it's the best system we have.

Here is my expanded line of thinking which will help clarify what's packed in so tightly to the synopsis above:

The Hierarchy of Nature

1. Physics: The Foundation of All Things

Physics is the most fundamental science. It deals with the bedrock principles of energy, matter, space, and time. Its laws govern everything else. It's the operating system of the universe—the core code that dictates how all interactions function. Physics explains why atoms, the most basic building blocks, behave the way they do.

2. Chemistry: The Interaction of Matter

Chemistry builds on physics. It is the science of how atoms and molecules interact with each other. It takes the fundamental laws of physics and applies them to specific configurations of matter. If physics is the universal operating system, then chemistry is the software that runs on that system, explaining how different components (elements) combine to form new things (molecules) and how they interact.

3. Biology: The Emergence of Life

Biology builds upon chemistry and physics. It is the science of living organisms. Life is a unique and intricate phenomenon that emerges from complex chemical reactions. To understand how a cell works, you must first understand the chemical reactions happening inside it. And to understand those reactions, you must understand the physical forces that govern the molecules involved. Biology is the application of chemical and physical laws to create a self-sustaining, replicating system. DNA is at the heart of this system.

4. Replication of DNA: The Source of All Motivation

Replication of DNA is the core mechanism that drives life at a fundamental level. It's the biological imperative for all living things to pass on their genetic information to the next generation. From this perspective, the drive to survive and reproduce can be seen as the ultimate "motivation" encoded in our genes.

5. Evolution: The Driving Force of Change

Evolution is the driving force behind the diversity of life. It is the large-scale process by which biological systems change over vast periods of time. This change is dictated by principles such as natural selection and genetic mutation, which act upon the small, heritable variations that arise during DNA replication. This process takes the principles of biology and shows how they lead to the incredible variety of organisms we see on Earth. It is the ultimate expression of the interplay between the laws of physics, chemistry, and biology over immense geological timescales.

6. Sociology: The Rules of Social Interaction

Sociology explains how humans, as social organisms, interact with each other to fulfill the drive of DNA replication. While biology explains the "what" of human existence (our physical form and genetic code), sociology explains the "how" of our interactions. It explores the structures, norms, and institutions we create to organize ourselves, from families to entire societies, all of which are shaped by the underlying biological and evolutionary forces.

7. Science and Nature: The Method and The Manifestation

Science is the method for understanding everything from atoms to humans. It is the systematic process of observing, hypothesizing, and testing that allows us to uncover the fundamental laws of physics, the complex reactions of chemistry, the intricate processes of biology, the driving force of evolution, and the social dynamics between humans. All of these disciplines, when combined, are our way of comprehending Nature.

Given that context, Here's the note again. I've also included a few thoughts I scribbled further down on the same page and... as per usual a directive for myself going forward.

"Nature is God"

The rules of life are written in nature. Physics explains the rules of the universe

Chemistry explains the rules of molecules

Biology explains the rules of life Evolution is the driving force behind all life Replication of DNA is the source of all motivation

Sociology explains how humans interact

Science is human's best method for learning how the world works.

Science is not perfect but it's the best system we have.

My god is nature. My bible is science.

Nature encompasses all the forces of the universe that shape life. It is the laws of nature + all possible variables. The outcome is what we experience today. We are at the end of millions of years of evolution and interaction under the laws of nature.

I have no influence over it. I'm here merely out of chance. I have no free will or power to change nature's course. I am a being that reacts to my environment. Everything that happens to me is luck.

I am very lucky. I don't need to take the things that happen to me personally. I don't need to be happy or stressed about other people's actions. They are simply beings that are acting in accordance with the laws of the universe. They are complex creatures reacting to their environment.

I should focus on putting myself in the best state of mind as possible, then make good decisions. Put 99% of effort into being in a good state of mind and spend 1% making good decisions.